838. Introduction to: "A Word That Isn't a Word But Should be a Word," or simply AWTIAWBSBAW

I play Words With Friends on my iPhone-wannabe. The friends are wannabes, too, but that's for another post.

I wouldn't say I'm addicted to the game--I only play it for about 20-30 minutes in the evening before going to bed, and for about the same amount of time in the morning--but I am definitely hooked. The more I play, the more I love it.

There's much more I will write about this game, from insights about the human condition this game has revealed to me, to the many different styles-of-play. But tonight I want to introduce a new blog feature called "A Word That Isn't a Word But Should be a Word." It is my hope that once I introduce you, my beautiful and intelligent million+ readers, to some words that aren't words but should be words, that those words will become words.

Should my mission fail, I'll just have to publish my own dictionary, and then submit it to scrabble, and then become the ultimate Words with Fr!?nds Champion of the World!!!! 

Our first A Word That Isn't a Word But Should be a Word, or AWTIAWBSBAW (pronounced: awe-tia-wob-sob-awe) is: Lipage.

Lipage:

(1) disrespectful speech or language, esp. towards an authority figure

Now I'm back to WWF and feeling much better that I'm a million+ people closer to lipage becoming a word.

Happy Words to you, now and always!

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*a AWTIAWBSBAW is one that is not included in Merriam-Webster Premium. Although a AWTIAWBSBAW may be in some other online sources, like, say, Urban Dictionary, I will only use M-W Premium for wordifermation. There. Another brilliant AWTIAWBSBAW. Wordifermation.

837. Sleepless at 3 a.m.

Used to be that the question "Is there an app for that?" would have been met with a suspicious gaze or a swift retreat. If you would have asked me that question even just a year ago, I would have answered it like the old geezer I feel I have become with a "What was that, sonny boy?"

Now that I am a proud smart phone user I have seen that question become obsolete as it seems that everything in life has been apped.

Thanks to Safeway's app I save at least $20 everytime I go grocery shopping. That app alone nearly covers our cell phone bill. And now that I've downloaded the Blogger app I can post from just about anywhere.

Now I'm off to download an app to help put me back to sleep. I'm willing to bet there's a counting sheep app just waiting for sleepless little me.

836. Really? Who knew I had so much to blog about.

Just when I thought I didn't have anything more to blog about, I went off and got married and had a baby! If those can't inspire blog posts, then I don't know what can.

I'm back. I really, truly am. But now I must go because a crying boy needs to be fed.

:)

835. Where's my doughnut?

Yesterday I went to Safeway to buy some cookies from their bakery for a potluck picnic. I found some yummy looking oatmeal and chocolate chip cookies, and just as I was putting them in my basket I heard somebody or something calling my name.

I scanned the bakery area but didn't see anybody I knew. Again I heard my name, but the voice sounded different and was much louder. I headed towards the far corner of the bakery area hoping it wasn't a doughnut that had called my name. For the past many months I've been pretty good at avoiding sugary sweets.

Unfortunately, it wasn't just one doughnut calling my name, but two: a chocolate covered old fashioned doughnut and a chocolate glazed raised doughnut.

I bagged them, lest they cause a bigger scene. The old fashioned doughnut managed to scream out, "Better get me some coffee, woman, or else the glazed raised gets it!"

Well, I don't know about you, but I'm not the type to let an innocent doughnut suffer; I had no choice but to get a café latte instead, since it was obvious that somebody was in a bad mood.

From there, I headed out to my car where at my hand, the raised doughnut got it along with the latte. I shoved the grumpy old fashioned one in my purse to consume it later.

Later happened in a half-hour in class. I grabbed my purse to retrieve the bagged doughnut, and much to my shock and dismay, it wasn't there! Somewhere between my car and class and thirty minutes, that blasted snarky old fashioned chocolate covered doughnut disappeared.

Today I turned on the radio to discover that today is National Doughnut Day*. I wondered if old grump fled not to avoid my stomach but to celebrate his special day.

I hope your doughnut day went better than mine.

Happy Doughnut Day!

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* I kid you not: today is National Doughnut Day. So, it's a sweet sentiment started by the Salvation Army to honor the women who during WW1 served doughnuts to our soldiers.

Still, it's pretty apropos that our nation, the fattest in the world (We're #1!), has a national doughnut day, don't you think?

From the World Health Organization (WHO) website:

-Overweight and obesity are the fifth leading risk for global deaths.
-At least 2.8 million adults die each year as a result of being overweight or obese.
-In 2010, around 43 million children under five were overweight.

Estimated Overweight & Obesity Prevalence for Males 15+ in 2010:

Those pretty colors mean that we are the fattest nation in the world. Greater than or equal to 80% of our over-15 guys are fat. Go USA.

833. I'm p.o.'d!

Never thought I would say this, but I'm passioned-out.

It's not quite what you think. Allow me to explain:

I'm taking a class called "Bible in Film", and we are currently focusing on Jesus' Passion (his suffering and death). A recent assignment required us to document the chronological account of the Passion as it appears in each of the four Gospels of the Bible (Matthew, Mark, Luke, and John). It sounded easy enough, but there are many details in each Passion account that you don't realize until you actually sit down and make note of them.

After slightly more than 15 single-spaced typed pages and I-don't-care-to-know-how-many hours, I felt badly that I didn't think to offer up my suffering, something Catholics^1,2 do as a charitable act.

Stiff neck and shoulders aside, it was a fun and interesting exercise that resulted in a cool class discussion. The Gospel accounts aren't identical, and people have interesting interpretations as to why this is so. In my pre-conversion days, or prior to 2.5 years ago, I would have said that the reason the stories don't jibe is because they are untrue. Now I think the fact that they are different, is remarkable.

A common theory about the Bible is that a bunch of men, with unholy agendas, got together and decided which stories would go in the Bible and which would be tossed into the fire. I'm not going to go into a discussion about the Bible creation process now, because my point is something else. Let's say that theory is right: A bunch of men with power decided which stories would go into the Bible for reason "x". (I won't address the issue of motives here either.)

Well, if that were true, why didn't the men leave out Luke and John, since Matthew and Mark are synoptical? Throwing in Luke is the equivalent of throwing a monkey wrench at two pretty much straightforward noncontradictory accounts; and John, a barrel of mystical monkeys.

I can hear the counter-argument now: That was the evil-genius of their plan! Everybody knows that no two people will give the exact same testimony about any given event; so, they included them to make the whole Jesus story sound more believable. Why didn't they include the other gospels, like the Gospel of Judas then? Or the Gospel of Mary?

In addition to a "whoa there, fella, too many questions!" response, I would ask, Why didn't they just put either Luke or John in? Why both? Either one of those would have had the same affect. If these men had so much power, influence, and less-than-noble intentions as people claim, why didn't they do what the Jewish people did with their Torah (coming from the counter-agruer position that religious books are merely creations of man with no divine influence), that is, throw in books in which the same story isn't told twice, but referenced in other books?

***silence***

No, it's not that I imagined I've won this imaginary debate... yet. I'm just tabling it for now, because I'm passioned-out and have got to go to bed.

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Questions? Comments? Typos? Tic-Tac-Toe? I'd love to hear from you...³

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¹ The idea is to "offer up" to God something you are suffering with or through for the sake of somebody else. As Father James Kubicki said in an interview at the National Catholic Register, "if we encounter a pain or frustration or hardship of any kind to make an offering of that to the Lord and in that way, join it to the cross... the pain and frustration that we go through then acquires an eternal significance and meaning because it’s working for the salvation of souls..."

² I've given it some more thought and realized it is never to late to offer any suffering up. Why? Well, God existed before the creation of time, and also exists outside of it. So, it follows that when we offer something up, it is no longer bound by time. Besides that, we're talking about God here; what can't the big Guy beyond the sky do?

³ Unless you are going to call me stupid, and then in that case I ask you to at least do the courtesy of sending chocolate, milk or white chocolate. (I know. I know. It's not real chocolate.)

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My 1st x is in the middle square; your move.

832. Happy Easter!

Easter is a celebration of an important resurrection, so I think it's a fitting time to bring this blog back to life.

I think I'm ready. I'll take one step at a time and we'll see where it leads. Want to join me?

Great! I was hoping you would say yes.

First, let me bring you up to speed: I'm back in the Bay Area. I'm also back in school; this time around, I'm majoring in Philosophy (a subject I had wanted to major in 20 years ago, but was too concerned about the utility of a Phil degree), and then my goal is to enter an upper-division Theology program.

I've also been contributing to a friend's design blog that is on her website. She is an amazing interior designer, but don't take my word for it! Check out her site, which you can access through the blog: The Design Salon

Well, that's all for now. If you have any questions or comments, please leave a note!

Happy Easter!

831. The more things change...

Italy and Israel are now pieces of my personal history; as is the man who brought me to Israel.

It's been 4 months since I've been back in California. They were four dark, sad, painful and lonely months that I would not like to relive again, but I also wouldn't trade them for the world. "Something's lost, but something's gained," lyrics from Joni Mitchell's Both Sides Now, sums it up nicely.

Last week I was in Yosemite for a couple of days. Driving past a long stretch of 20 foot seemingly lifeless and leafless trees--survivors of a fire at least a couple of decades ago--I was reminded of beginnings and endings, and how endless the cycle is.